VERY long time, no blog !

It has been forever and a day since I sat and typed out a blog. To say I have been busy, is it's usual understatement .. but for this time I have now, I sit here and type.

I sat down some time ago and thought about this particular blog and what I wanted from it.. as if you couldn't tell..... I got sidetracked. My original plan had hopes of helping my family get back to the basics of life .. like seriously, THE BASICS. Ummm, well, that has not worked thus far .. my hopes of an "almost" quite Amish lifestyle is far from reality. In fact I think I went the wrong way.

You see, my real friends know me as someone who can't cook (haha, another understatement)and am so far from 'basic' stuff that I am considered quite spoiled. I can sew, but have little patience for it anymore .. I can wash a dish or ring out clothes, but I have machines for that. I am not by any means frugal - if we have the so called extra money it usually gets spent on eating out or stuff for this house - (that is not ours, but that we cant really say we pay that much for either)so my thoughts of something Little House on The Prairie like, are quite less then exemplary and far from it.

So lets take cooking as the main example. While I do not put anything into my body of foreign substance (like ANY drugs or pills, alcohol and even Tylenol) I do however fill it with fat and eat out JUNK. Something that has been on my heart for quite a while to STOP doing - stop eating junk .. make it more natural kinda thing.. but I AM LAZY. SO.. thus fore it keeps happening. I just do not like cooking... I do not find it at all relaxing or eventful. I get so blahhh cooking, I would rather stab myself in the eye with a fork. I have issues with food anyway... I can't touch MEAT, uMMM, Eeew. I would rather pay someone to do that for me. But vomit lurks when I am in the vacinity of dead, killed, butchered and rotting flesh. Like I said, I dont know WHY, but I am that way .. spoiled and a brat no doubt.

I can only imagine how people of the older generation felt when they HAD to kill the meat or starve. Yipes, atleast I was born now.. but then again maybe I would have learned something living back then.

I WANT to be better at it, I do. I wish I could sew all of our clothes and cook all of our own, homegrown food. I wish my girls played instruments and sang songs .. I wish we had a big huge bus and as we drove down the road we all could sing Jesus songs .. lol. But for my family that is no where close to reality.

I have just come to the realization that getting rid of the TV (a fight I have had with myself for 15 years now) just might be coming into play here... I wish I had realized what the Lord was trying to tell me all those years back ! The Lord KNEW what I wanted even when it was, I said I didn't ! Funny how life works that way .. but rebellion and time make me feel as if by the time I am a grandmother, I will finally actually get it all.

I am not a proprietor of patience. But yet, I know I am a work in progress.

More to come at another time ....