TODAY ..

In all general aspects. I HATE today.

It is my birthday.

I am 34. Crap ! - when did that happen ? I DON'T WANNA be 34 ! I WANNA be 7 !

I hate today.

I wish I could really say that I liked it, but I never really have. Every year since ever .. since I can remember, I always feel the same way ... MAYBE someone will actually do something for me, a card, a gift. Never nothing ...nada.

I remember only 4 parties growing up but never a cake, My birthday is the same day as my sisters who is exactly ten years older than I, (born 64, and I in 74) so all the parties done were mainly hers. Full of her friends and people, games etc. I remember having like ONE friend over. Once she left home I remember having a party that I invited people to, but NO ONE came.  After that we always did our birthdays over at my Gramma's house, her birthday was the 7th, and my cousin Gary's was the 12th. I always hated it ! The only good thing was that I could see Gary, because he was more like a brother to me.

Even that is long gone now .. Both Gary and Gramma have passed away and no one in my family ever remembers it is even my birthday, or if they do, they don't care. I really have no personal friends NEAR me that come to visit and only two of my closest friends say anything to me.

It is true, most of the time I sit in the house and stay far away from public as possible, I hate being around people most days, so I guess I have no right to complain.

I kinda just have a part of me that wishes things were different.

Thank all of you here who wish me a Happy Day, it touches my heart that all of you care to take the time out of your day to say that to me !

Sometimes tho it would be nice to hear it from the ones I am supposed to be loved by.

TAMMIE 

(and the "333" pic is because I was born, November 3rd, @ 3:33 am ... so 333 sorta just became my number because of it. Kinda neat. )