Wednesday, September 24, 2008
EVERY OTHER DAY ....
Hello my frenz :o) I am trying super hard today to be as positive as possible. It seems my moods are every other day .. one day is good the next bad. It is weird how that is working. Today is a low day. Anyway, I called to make a doctor appointment this morning and since I am about at the point of using rent money to pay or commit myself, I thought it was about time. He, however is totally booked for about two weeks ... so looks like I still have to wait. I figure in the mean time I either need to get drunk or go make a visit to me Aunt Nancy for some pick me up. Yeaaa, petty bad when for the first time evr you'd consider using drugs to curve the problem. My kids are driving me crazy today ... I REALLY REALLY wish I had someone to give me a break from them for a few days. I have never felt that bad .... which makes me feel worse, I mean Jordan is 17 and up until rright now I have never ever used a sitter, but man ... sure would be nice to have someone I trust live near to sit for me. So anyway... I can't seem to make any headway on anything around here ... I get something done and there is always something else.. it never ends. I haven't slept well at all in the last few days, my kids are running circles around me .. um, literally. Gracie has learned to climb over my baby gate ... so I am going crazy with that too ... As for me Id really like to have a few days to just get things done around here .. ya maybe a week even would be nice. But for now my time is spent more on poopy diapers, screaming, running noses, cleaning up the whole can of soda that Gracie just dumped over and shampooing the carpet. Ugh.. sigh... I dunno... I just need something.. a cry, a nap, help ?! shit ... I dunno anymore. I wish this ride would just stop so I can get off, it is making me sick. I am being a downer again and Im sorry.. but this is my reality show. hahaha .. maybe in the next episode theryll be sumfin more exciting. hahaha ... oh brother .. I really think Im going crazy ....... Hope yall are having a good day. :o) Mucho luv !!!!
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Is there some sort of crisis house for kids somewhere near you? we have one here and you can drop your kids off free of charge for an hour or days (not that you would do that) to get a break. I know that I only have ONE child and if I did not get a break sometimes I would go NUTS! I can't believe that you have never left them with a sitter! You are more of a woman than me :)
ReplyDeleteHey...
ReplyDeleteSorry things are down today.
Im just thinking here but why cant Jordon give you 2 hours in the evening just to get stuff done? If he knows the discipline rules etc then the kids can go to him with whatever they need...i know Gracie is a bit more work but maybe he could trade you that for something fun in exchange that he would like to do (hang with friends or something).
Meg will watch Kristin if I need to make a store run with Nick..Saturday it was home depot with nick and we were gone 2 hours. She knows that she gets to do things with her bf more easily because she helps me around the house.
Try not to let things bother you so much.
Oh and another idea...what about clearning a table and just declare GROUP activity and let the older ones help the younger..like playdough or paint...Also you could make a chore chart so EACH child is RESPONSIBLE for THEIR items...that will keep them busy too. I dont know if that helps but i juist thought I would mention it.
Hope your evening is better! HUGS
I know how you are feeling. I wish I had some words of wisdom to make you feel better. I'm in the same boat right now...feeling like crap...needing...wanting to be by myself...away from the house and kids.
ReplyDeleteTrish has a good point...Can Jordan watch the kids for a few hours. It just might be the break you really need.
I think Trish might have a good point about Jordan...have you ever thought of that? Or maybe giving the kids some of the responcibiblies so you don't have to do it all yourself?
ReplyDeleteSorry you are still having a rough time.
I agree with Trish also...My kids have things that they do to help me out and when they don't....I let them know it by having one of my so cold yelling fits lol and they thought only they could yell well ha I fooled them lol
ReplyDeleteI am sorry you are having a rough time...if you don't mind me asking what kind of medicine are you are that you are out of?
Sorry everything is so rough today~
ReplyDeleteI hope the kids help you out with things around the house. Hope things get better soon for you..
Sorry today is another rough day for you. Hope things get better for you.
ReplyDeleteHi guys...
ReplyDeleteBoth Jordan and Brittany have been helping out in the evenings after school anymore.. and it is becoming an everyday thing which makes me feel bad cz it shouldn't be their responsibility.... but with everything going on it is the days Im having an ecspecilly hard time with. They are in school and can't help then.
We have no other place around that helps unless you pay out the butt for it. and I can't afford that either.
Cheryl.. you asked what pills I was out of - one is called Sertraline ... this right now is the major ones. I have anziety and nervous problems due to my illness and they help.. but the refill is 90 dollars and canot be afforded right now.
As of thismoment, I am ok on most of my others. :o) :o)
I am sorry for how your day is going today.....Big hugs!
ReplyDeleteI am sorry that today is a down day. I think somedays you just need to let go a little... and accept that not everything is going to get done.
ReplyDeleteI think all the kids, as soon as they are older than 2 can have jobs to help you out. I have always made my kids responsible for things like putting away their own wash, picking up after themselves.... etc. Because I have always needed the extra help AND I think it teaches them responisibilty too.
I'm sorry you're going through a rough patch. Know that asking your kids to help out is NOT taking advantage of them. I'm thinking, if you explain to your eldest what is going on, and a little extra effort on his or her part, would be very helpful, they may surprise you?? Even if they complain about it, eventually they will look back and realize how helpful they were. As for during the day...I feel your pain! Only what, 4 more years before Gracie starts school??? lol ;)
ReplyDeleteYou do need to get away..some time for yourself. I know it's hard to. I hope tomorrow is a better day.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry today is a rough one. There's always tomorrow....or the next day.
ReplyDeleteI'm sorry to hear your feeling down. That's crappy that there is a two week wait on the doctor too.
ReplyDeleteI really hope you get your meds your out of soon. I don't know your medical issue for needing the meds but I'm sure it some of your issues may be you're not taking them???
Can you not leave your eldest in charge while you take maybe two hours to go out and find you time?
OMG I can relate. I am sitting here dreading the day to start because I know the daycare kids are going to start showing up and I really don't feel like dealing with the screaming and the snot. I have one that has had this bug for 3 weeks. I wish his mom would stop kissing him on the mouth so they would stop passing it back & forth to each other. Then she bitches because she doesn't understand why they are always sick. Well, DUH!!!!!! Anyway, how can one 2 year old have so much snot in their head? It didn't help I woke up thinking it was Friday & my head hurts.
ReplyDeleteTry to have a good day!
Oh there is a church that has "Thursday school" here for 2 hours every thursday morning so moms can have some me time. I don't know about the cost but maybe they will let you work there one week to help with all the kids and then you can have some me time the next. Just a thought.
ReplyDelete